Assign This Guy to REALLY Cold Cases

This is the sorry state to which crime fiction on television has come. TV Squad reports that “FOX has ordered a pilot for a new cop show with the working title of New Amsterdam. The new series is about a cop who, unbeknownst to everyone, is actually centuries old because he’s cursed with immortality. I always thought that was the plot of Columbo, shows what I know. Allan Loeb and Christian Taylor wrote the pilot script, but beyond that not much is known about the series. I like to think the cop will spend most of the episodes lusting after septuagenarians who are way too young for him.”